Corporate Jiu Jitsu: How To Turn Your Boss' Strength Into Your Leverage

Read Time: 4 minutes.

You're aligned with the CEO's vision. Your team respects your approach. You feel at home in the culture.

But your direct boss?

Different story.

• Maybe they optimize for speed while you optimize for quality.

• Maybe they're results-focused while you're people-focused.

• Maybe they love the details while you think strategically.

Here's what most leaders do: Complain, become a chameleon, or fight every battle.

Here's what smart leaders do:

Use their boss's strengths strategically to achieve their own goals.

Welcome to leadership Jiu Jitsu.

The Three-Layer Boss Analysis

Before you can influence up effectively, you need a high-fidelity picture of your boss across three dimensions:

Layer 1: What They Optimize For

• Mission-driven: Social impact, company purpose, long-term vision

• Money-driven: Revenue, profit, personal financial success

• Power-driven: Influence, recognition, career advancement

• Process-driven: Efficiency, systems, operational excellence

Layer 2: How They Operate

• Communication style: Direct vs. diplomatic, data vs. stories

• Decision-making: Fast vs. thorough, collaborative vs. independent

• Feedback preference: Frequent vs. periodic, public vs. private

• Stress response: Micromanage vs. delegate, push harder vs. step back

Layer 3: Where They're Strong (and Weak)

• Superpowers: What they're genuinely excellent at

• Blind spots: What they avoid or struggle with

• Preferences: What energizes vs. drains them

If you watch them carefully, the 80/20 of this picture will emerge.

The Jiu Jitsu Framework

Instead of fighting your boss's style, redirect their energy toward your objectives.

Technique 1: The Strategic Redirect

The Setup: Your boss complains about something you can't directly control.

The Move: Make it their problem to solve, using their unique position.

Example from the transcript😀 

Instead of: "Compliance is slowing us down, but I'm doing my best."

Try: "All this compliance is holding us back from hitting our targets. I've pushed as far as I can at my level. Could you use your strategic influence with the compliance team to help us find ways to take more calculated risks here and here?"

Why it works: Appeals to their ego and position while getting them to solve your problem.

Technique 2: The Fingerprint Smear

The Setup: You need buy-in for a decision or approach.

The Move: Get them to co-author the solution so they can't later criticize it.

Two variations:

For Detail-Oriented Bosses: Bring a rough draft and ask for their expertise on specific elements.

"I've got the framework, but I think your experience with [their strength] could really improve the [specific section]. What am I missing?"

For Big-Picture Bosses: Bring a well-developed plan but highlight 2-3 strategic decisions where their judgment is crucial.

"I feel good about this plan, but a couple strategic calls will determine success. Given your experience with [relevant area], can I get your to weight in on these decisions?"

Why it works: They can't tear apart something they helped create.

Technique 3: The Language Translation

The Setup: You need to communicate progress, problems, or requests.

The Move: Frame everything in their “love language.”

Translation Examples:

If they optimize for money:

• Don't say: "This will improve team morale."

• Say: "This will reduce turnover costs and increase productivity by X%."

If they optimize for speed:

• Don't say: "We need to be thorough."

• Say: "Spending two days on this prevents three weeks of rework."

If they optimize for recognition:

• Don't say: "This is the right thing to do."

• Say: "This positions you as the leader who solved [visible problem]."

Advanced Techniques

The Preemptive Strike

When you know your boss will ask for something unrealistic:

"I know you're going to want us to move faster on [project]. I've been thinking about how we could accelerate this. If you could help me get [specific resource/decision], we could cut the timeline by [specific amount]. Worth exploring?"

The Strength Deployment

When facing a challenge outside your expertise:

"This [problem] is exactly the kind of thing you're brilliant at. I've done the groundwork, but I think your [specific skill] could unlock the solution. Could you take a look?"

The Strategic Alliance

When you're aligned with your skip-level manager:

Don't: Go around your boss or create obvious triangulation
Do: Use skip-level insights to better understand your boss's pressures and motivations

“If I’m reading the situation accurately, I think [skip level] values [specific outcome]. Here’s a plan I believe will let us hit our goals while also hitting their goal.”

Common Mistakes to Avoid

The Adaptation Trap: Changing your entire leadership style to match theirs
Fix: Adapt your communication, not your core approach

The Complaint Spiral: Venting about their style to peers or team
Fix: Channel that energy into strategic influence

The Direct Challenge: Fighting their preferences head-on
Fix: Redirect their energy toward your goals

The Assumption Error: Thinking they should work like you
Fix: Accept their optimization function and work with it

Quietly Measuring Success

Leading Indicators:

• Your boss asks for your input more frequently

• Fewer of your proposals get shot down

• You spend less time managing up, more time leading

Lagging Indicators:

• Your team gets more resources and support

• Your initiatives move faster through the organization

• Your boss advocates for you in rooms you're not in

Your Next Move

This week:

1. Complete the three-layer analysis of your boss

2. Identify one current challenge where you could use their strengths

3. Practice one Jiu Jitsu technique in a low-stakes situation

4. Observe how they respond and adjust your approach

Remember: The goal isn't to manipulate your boss. It's to create conditions where both of you can succeed by leveraging each other's strengths.

Great leaders don't just manage down. They strategically influence up.

What You Missed This Week

Our Sunday AM posts:

📌 20 Questions To Attract (and Keep) Top Talent (Dave on LI)
📌 11 Lessons to Shift Your Habits (Mar on LI)
📌 Complex Decision-Making Made Easy (Dave on X)

And here are our most popular posts last week:

🔥 How to Speak Your Boss’ Language (Dave on LI)
🔥 Why The 9-Box is The Worst HR Tool Ever (Dave on X)
🔥 Why You Should Invest More in the Team You Have (Mar on LI)

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Thank you for reading. Appreciate you!

Dave