Find Your Path: How to Quickly Exit An Existential Crisis

Read Time: 4 minutes.

Here are two stats that shocked me:

1. 91% of managers want their teams to start using AI

2. Only 15% of these same managers are using it themselves

This couldn’t be true I thought, so I asked a room of 350 business owners when I was speaking to them a few months ago.

“Put your hand up if you’ve asked your team to start using AI.”
Nearly the every hand in the room shot up. 

“Keeps your hand up if you’ve used AI yourself this week.”
Almost every hand went down.

This is why we enhanced the MGMT Accelerator with AI tips and tools.

Not because we think AI will make a bad manager a good one. It won’t. The foundational principles it takes to lead people effectively haven’t changed. Clear communication. Thoughtful delegation. Actionable feedback. These are never going out of style.

But every manager we work with has more to do than hours they could possible work.

They have good intentions, but they don’t have the time.

That’s where AI comes in. It can’t manage for you, but it can help you make good on your good intentions by helping you move faster. Draft communications. Analyze performance data. Short circuit meeting prep. Actions that might have taken hours can be 80% complete in seconds.

And those leaders treating it as a “nice-to-have” are the ones who’ll be left behind.

Let us help.

Our last cohort for 2025 kicks off Tuesday October 7th at 11 AM ET.

50 leaders will get our help tailoring the same systems that earned us the top management program on Maven 3 years running. And now they’ll get practical tips for using AI to supercharge them.

And it’s risk free. We have a 100% guarantee (that we’ve never been asked to apply).

Grab one of the 4 remaining seats today. 

When Everything Becomes One Big Knot

You know the conversation. Someone sits across from you—could be a team member, a peer, or yourself in the mirror—and says some version of: "I'm having a midlife crisis."

What follows is a tangled mess of connected problems: Business shifts, potential career pivots, team transitions, market forces, personal relationships, financial decisions, and life changes all swirled together into one overwhelming knot.

This is what I call the "synthetic problem." They’ve taken multiple separate (solvable) issues and rolled them into one highly connected, unsolvable mess. And then they’ve accidently loaded it with emotion by calling it an "existential crisis."

Here's the thing:

I’ve never never anyone solve it as one big problem.

They solve it by untangling each thread.

Why Smart People Create Synthetic Problems

The Connection Trap
Everything feels related because some things actually are related. But your brain starts connecting dots that don't need to be connected, creating artificial dependencies.

The Overwhelm Response
When facing multiple challenges, it's easier to label it all as one big "life crisis" than to deal with each issue separately.

The Decision Paralysis
When everything feels connected, you can't make any decision without considering all the other decisions. This is the origin story of analysis paralysis.

The Narrative Protection
Sometimes "existential crisis" becomes a story that protects you from taking action on specific, solvable problems.

The Thread-Untangling Framework

Step 1: Separate the Threads

Take everything swirling in their head and put each issue on a separate line.

The Brain Dump Process:

• "Tell me everything that's making this feel overwhelming"

• Write each separate issue on its own line

• Extract. Don't organize or prioritize yet.

Example threads:

• My company’s culture is becoming corporate

• Uncertainty about long-term career path

• Team member potentially leaving

• Personal relationship decisions

• Financial planning concerns

• I want to live in Portugal

Tip: Steal my Daily Answer Drip

Step 2: Classify Each Thread

Not all problems are the same type. Different threads require different approaches.

The Thread Categories:

Decisions to Make: Clear choices with identifiable options
Example: "Should I start my own business or stay with current company?"

Situations to Navigate: Ongoing circumstances you need to manage
Example: "How do I work effectively under new PE ownership?"

Unknowns to Explore: Questions that need more data before decisions
Example: "What would starting my own business actually look like?"

Feelings to Process: Emotional responses that need acknowledgment
Example: "I'm frustrated with the lack of control over my situation"

Step 3: Take Each Thread to Its End

Most people stop thinking when things get uncomfortable. Push each thread to its logical conclusion.

The "What Then?" Process:

• "Let's say you choose Option A. What happens next?"

• "And then what?"

• "What's the worst case scenario?"

• "What's the best case scenario?"

• "What's the most likely scenario?"

Example:
"Let's say you start your own business. What then?"
"I'd need to find clients and build revenue."
"And then what?"
"I'd probably struggle the first year but could potentially make more long-term."
"What's the worst case?"
"I fail and have to find another job, but I'd have learned something."

Tip: Tim Ferriss’ Fear-Setting Exercise

Step 4: Identify What You Actually Control

Separate what you can influence from what you can't.

Three Categories:

• Full Control: Your decisions, actions, and responses

• Some Influence: Situations you can partially shape

• No Control: External circumstances and other people's choices

Focus Energy Accordingly:

• Spend 80% of mental energy on what you fully control

• Spend 20% on what you can influence

• Spend 0% worrying about what you can't control

The Decision-Making Sequence

Once threads are untangled, tackle them in the right order:

1. Handle the Urgent and Clear First

Some threads have deadlines or clear next steps. Do these first to create momentum.

2. Gather Information on the Unknowns

For threads that require more data, create specific plans to get that information.

• "I need to understand what starting my own business would actually involve"

• "I should talk to three people who've made similar transitions"

• "I need to model the financial implications"

3. Make the Reversible Decisions

Some choices can be undone or adjusted. Make these before the irreversible ones.

4. Address the Irreversible Decisions Last

Big, permanent choices should come after you've learned from the smaller, clearer issues.

The Coaching Conversation Framework

When someone brings you their "existential crisis":

Don't: Try to solve the whole thing or give advice on life direction

Do: Help them untangle the threads and think through each one clearly

Your Role:

• Question asker: "What would happen if...?"

• Pattern spotter: "I notice you keep coming back to..."

• Reality tester: "Is that assumption actually true?"

• Option generator: "What other possibilities exist?"

Key Phrases:

• "Let's separate that into different issues"

• "What would need to be true for that to work?"

• "If you knew you couldn't fail, what would you choose?"

• "What's the smallest step you could take to test that?"

Your Next Move

If you're feeling overwhelmed by multiple connected problems:

1. Set aside 2 hours for a complete brain dump and thread separation

2. Pick the clearest thread and take one concrete action on it this week

3. Schedule time to work through each thread systematically

If someone brings you their existential crisis:

1. Resist the urge to give immediate advice

2. Help them untangle by asking questions and separating issues

3. Support their thinking rather than thinking for them

Because existential crises aren't actually existential.
They're just multiple regular problems tangled together.

And regular problems have regular solutions.
You just have to untangle them first.

What You Missed This Week

Our Sunday AM posts:

📌 11 Quiet Coaching Lessons To Get You Unstuck (Dave on LI)
📌 9 Leadership Habits to Build (Mar on LI)
📌 8 AI-Powered Management Videos (Dave on X)

And here are our most popular posts last week:

🔥 Become The Leader People Never Quit (Dave on LI)
🔥 How to Handle Low Performers with Clarity and Care (Dave on X)
🔥 The Rare Traits of High-Performers (Mar on LI)

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You can help us by reposting anything that resonates with you.  

Thank you for reading. Appreciate you!

Dave